Walt Hampton, J.D.

Creating the Work & Life You LOVE

Sexy. Not.

by Walt | Jan 24, 2013 | Success | 0 Comments

I had the absolute worst run ever last weekend.

It wasn’t very long; it wasn’t very cold. It was the same damn course we always run.

But I was slow; it was painful; I never loosened up. And when I was finished, I felt as if someone had beaten me with a 2 x 4.

The next run might be painful too. Or not. Who knows?

It doesn’t really matter.

Because here’s the scoop: At the end of the day, there is only one core principle of success.

Doing the work.

We coaches love to have fancy templates for goal setting, and mind maps and vision boards… and all sorts of stuff that helps folks get clear and excited and juiced up about where they’re going. And juiced up and excited is good. But the bloom comes off the rose pretty fast.

I looked around the gym on Friday. Most of the newbies had disappeared. Right on time.

Few folks who even bother to resolve make it beyond the 1st of February.

Because doing the work is hard. And it just ain’t sexy.

Of course the “why” is important. But if you’re crystal clear about your “why;” why it is you want to bother; why it is that the result really matters; why it is that you really care; then you’ll stay the course.

Nietzsche said, “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

So claim your “why.” Know it well. And then shut up and do the work.

George Leonard who wrote that great old book Mastery using the metaphor of Akido practice said that the only thing that really mattered on the road to mastery was showing up on the mat.

Julia Cameron, author of the Artists Way, said that a writer’s only obligation was to show up on the page and write.

Nike™ in its venerable campaign would say, “Just do it.”

Run the miles
Lift the weights
Follow the plan: the eating plan, the financial plan, the weight-loss plan.

Discipline’s a dirty word. So call it practice. Or whatever.

Just show up and do the work.

Because that’s the only way it will get done.

Sexy. Not.

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Blind Spot

by Walt | Jan 17, 2013 | Success | 0 Comments

I love my Subaru Outback. This is the fourth one I’ve had.

It’s fuel efficient, comfortable, and roomy; it’s great over rough terrain. It’s reliable in the snow and cold. And for all of our crazy outdoor activities, there couldn’t be a better vehicle.

Except that it has a blind spot.

Left hand side. Behind the driver’s seat. You could hide a panel van in it. And on more than one occasion, a van or two has hidden there.

Of course, I’ve learned to deal with it.

I pay particular attention to that blind spot.

A good thing to do: pay attention to the blind spots.

You see, we all have them: Places where things don’t work quite as well as others; places that could use some improvement; places that, if they are ignored, could result in incidents and accidents.

If you look at the major areas of your life,

Career/business
Finance
Relationships
Health and Fitness
Spiritual/Emotional
Community Contribution; and
Celebration

you’ll undoubtedly latch onto one or two in which you excel.

We like those places; those places where we find our ‘wins;’ where we feel valued for our expertise; where we consistently feel at the top of our game. And because we like those places, we tend to spend a lot of time there.

And if you glance down the list again, you’ll land on one or two areas that could use some work, that tend to trip you up.

Blind spots.

One of my blind spots tends to be ‘Celebration.’ As an (over) achiever, I’m prone to ‘ticking off’ accomplishments, and moving on… not really stopping to appreciate, acknowledge or celebrate the attainment of the goal.

No matter where you are on your journey, you’ll find one… a blind spot.

Oprah, one of the wealthiest, most successful women on the planet, has a bind spot: her health and fitness; her weight has been an albatross for years.

No one escapes.

And here’s the truth: it’s easy to ignore our blind spots. It doesn’t feel good to turn the light on those places that need some care. (It’s much more fun to spend our time on where we rock and roll.) But when we do, even for just a bit, we can up our game – improve our lives – immensely.

And avoid the panel van.

What will you work on this week?

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I don’t know: Maybe it’s the tree that’s the real problem.

Buried Treasure

by Walt | Jan 10, 2013 | Success | 0 Comments

I talk a lot about the F* word.

In fact, it’s one of my very favorite words.

Fun.

But my F* word, it seems, isn’t always fun or fanciful for folks to hear about.

In fact, I frequently find that discussions of fun can make folks downright frantic – fretful and frenetic!

Case in point: I had finished speaking to a professional association and was in the back of the room signing books. A man approached. He was in his mid-forties; a bit overweight; still dressed in his jacket and tie at 8:00 in the evening. He was pale and wide-eyed… and nearly breathless.

“I have a serious problem with what you just said,” he nearly yelled.

In a moment of panic, my mind raced back over the keynote I had just delivered, scanning it for what might have been upsetting, unsettling, unnerving, controversial.

While I certainly have the capacity to cross the line from time to time, I couldn’t think of a damn thing.

What seems to be the problem?” I asked.

Now, even more wide-eyed, and even more breathless, he blurted: “I can’t remember what’s fun.”

And – seriously – I thought he was going to cry.

The theme of my talk had been the importance of nurturing ourselves; of re-creating ourselves; of re-capturing a grand and exciting vision for our lives. I had ended it with a call to arms of sorts: “Reclaim the fun, reclaim the laughter, reclaim the joy.” (Kinda mainstream stuff I had – erroneously – thought.)

But this man couldn’t remember the fun; he couldn’t remember what once brought him joy.

And in that moment he had confronted an abyss that can overtake even those of us most vigilant.

Buried as he was (and as so many of us are) in the responsibilities of his work, his marriage, his children, the bills , the boss, the clients, the cholesterol, the mortgage, the tuitions, the parents, the in-laws, the blood pressure, the e-mails, the voice-mails, the text messages, the in-box, the out box, the lawn, the snow plowing, the never-ending demands and expectations that are the fabric of our lives… .

He had forgotten. What was fun. And he had freaked!

Luckily, it’s not hard to find the fun. I took him aside to the corner of the room. And quietly connected:

What were your extracurricular activities in high school?
What did you love to do in college?
What makes you laugh?
If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?
If you could buy any magazine on the shelf, what would it be?
If money and time were no object, what would you do?

He smiled. There was a glimmer. He could remember.

No, recovering what was fun, what once rung your bell is not difficult. The challenge, it seems, is to go out and do it again.

To give to yourself the “luxury” of joy.

I have a dear friend who always admonishes: Never forget the fun-factor.

Fun is fundamental to our wholeness.

Without the fun, we lose our horizons.

This week: make it a point to do something – for yourself – just for fun.

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This, we refer to as Type II Fun: Fun in retrospect!

DIY or SOSDD?

by Walt | Jan 3, 2013 | Finding The Way, Success | 0 Comments

A new year. Filled with opportunity; filled with possibility.

What will it be for you?

What will you do?

Where will you go?

How will you share your gifts?

How will you change the world?

You get to choose.

Will you choose health and fitness?
Will you choose work that deeply satisfies?
Will you choose a relationship that nourishes and enriches?
Will you choose to serve and share?
Will you choose to learn and grow?

Or will it be the same old same old?

Most folks who make such resolutions – and frankly only a few brave souls even bother – abandon the effort by the end of January (that’s right, by the end of this month). That’s because their “why” isn’t big enough; their drive not strong enough; their discipline not honed enough; their vision not clear enough.

And then one day ends up being just like the next; this new year just like the last. Same old shit different day. Dull, and bland and vanilla.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.

You can create a masterpiece. You can choose to make your life extraordinary. You can design a life lived on your own terms, rich and full and satisfying: A purpose-driven life.

Do It Yourself is not easy; it’s not simple. The DIY path is steep and winding. There are obstacles and dangers; fears and frustrations; and failure along the way.

And it’s certainly not for the faint of heart. Those that take on the project of life design know that the road ahead will be filled with challenge, that they will need good mentors and coaches, that they will need to avoid the naysayers, that they will need to surround themselves with folks who will affirm their effort and support the journey.

But, damn, it’s a whole lot more interesting – and fun; a whole lot more textured and satisfying – filled with wonder and awe – than vanilla.

To live out loud; to push beyond your comfort zone; to explore the impossible; to live with intention and purpose, with passion and possibility, with vision and hope; to live a life designed and co-created; to share with the world the gifts that are yours alone to share; to serve at the highest level possible; to lead the way for others: That is your call. That is the obligation that each of us has in the world.

And if you take on this challenge, if you live from that place of authenticity and vibrancy, then a year from now, you will look back and say, “Wow, what a ride this has been.”

Step up. This is your year.

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If you’d like support along your chosen path, schedule a complimentary breakthrough strategy session today! Email me at: [email protected]

The Real Guide To Avoiding The Cliff

by Walt | Dec 27, 2012 | Leadership, Success | 1 Comment

In life itself, there is a time to seek inner peace, a time to rid oneself of tension and anxiety. The moment comes when the striving must let up, when wisdom says, “Be quiet.” You’ll be surprised how the world keeps on revolving without your pushing it. And you’ll be surprised how much stronger you are the next time you decide to push.”
— John Gardner

I pushed the throttle forward and hurtled even faster toward the cliff.

Then I stopped.

Not because I really wanted to. But because I had promised myself I would.

I returned once again, last week, to the Weston Priory, nestled on a remote hilltop in northern Vermont. To rest; to re-create; to renew. (I set as my intention to do this four times a year; this year I made it there three times.)

Going completely off the grid to a monastery, especially at this time of year, can be tough duty for an achievement and adrenaline junkie like me.

But what I know for sure is that the stopping is essential to the going.

We – all of us – are bombarded by inputs, and demands and expectations. We’re inundated with voice mails and text messages, emails and faxes. Everyone and everything competes for our attention. And with our “smart” phones, we’re always “on.”

One day melds into the next as we labor under our self-imposed illusions that if we can but accomplish just a little bit more, pack in just a little bit more, respond to just one more request, satisfy just one more customer, cart the child just one more place, buy just one more gift, send just one more card, then we’ll be able to rest.

Culturally – and individually – we’re weary. Add in the holidays – and societal tragedies – and, at the end of the day, most of us feel worn pretty thin.

We forget how important – how essential – renewal is.

Rest days are a key component of high-altitude mountaineering. Recovery is a critical piece of athletic training.

Bears hibernate; trees go dormant. The natural world knows how to rest. The seasons have a rhythm to them. We not so much.

We keep on pushing on.

I finished on wonderful book while on retreat: Life Entrepreneurs by Christopher Gergen and Gregg Vanourek. It resonates so profoundly with the work I do: empowering extraordinary living. Its essential message: “We can fashion a life that is purposeful, self-directed and aligned with who we truly are – providing us with opportunities for challenge, contribution, and fulfillment.” We get to design our lives. We get to choose.

It’s a hard-driving book filled with fascinating profiles of highly successful, remarkably creative leaders, innovators and entrepreneurs. It explores all of the nuances of extraordinary lives. And it captures a core component of success, one overlooked by nearly all gurus, coaches, and achievement “experts:” the need to stop; to renew; to re-create.

Speed kills. “We ignore the basics of our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being at our own peril.” Make renewal “a cherished habit,” the authors say.

Not all of us need to go off the grid to a monastery for four days at a time (although I highly recommend it!). But there are practices and “habits” that you could explore that might allow for some breathing room. Here are some things that you might want to try:

Turn off your electronics for a day (or even just an hour!)
Explore a regular mediation practice
Take a yoga class
Do some aerobic exercise every day
Walk in the woods or along the shore
Avoid your email in-box in the morning
Work in block time to avoid the interruptions
Don’t multi-task (it doesn’t really work anyway)
Take regular vacations, long weekends, and mental health days
Learn to say ‘no’ more often

Even though this time of year often feels frantic and out of control, even though we’re fond of telling ourselves that we’ll get to the important stuff after the holidays, there really is no better time to pull back to nurture yourself. No one else will do it for you. (Check out the recent talk I gave on this.)

The authors of Life Entrepreneurs remind us what John Muir once said: “I only went out for a walk and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in.”

When you go in, you’ll find how much more there is of you to step out with – to share with the world.

You can avoid the cliff.

All you need to do is stop.

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